"I can't help but think of other women who may be facing similar situations, even now in a time and generation when these events can easily be exposed as much as they could be hidden. I wish I could reach each one of them, look into their eyes and tell them: you don't have to live like this. Life can be better; you can choose a different path. It's not easy, trust me, I know that more than most people do, BUT IT'S WORTH IT."
This book is an autobiography about a woman raised on a large farm who learned to drive a large tractor at the age of seven, then spent many years plowing, planting and harvesting crops and taking care of the farm animals. After three years in the Marine Corps, she married her college sweetheart who became a drunk and abused her for seven horrible years before he almost killed her then disappeared. After she recovered she and her three kids fled to Florida to hide so he wouldn't find them and finish the job.
A few weeks ago, after one of Phil’s drunken rages, I decided that the kids and I would start camping out in the cornfield surrounding the house to avoid getting in his way. The plan was simple: we’d head out about an hour before he typically staggered home and stay hidden and out of sight until we were sure he had returned and passed out in bed. After that, we would crawl back into the house, get tucked in, and wake up the following day when Phil would have recovered from his stupor, and we could go back to being a regular family until we had to do it all over again at night. This way, we could avoid the brunt of his tirades and tantrums, and, most importantly, I could retain some semblance of peace, normalcy, and quiet for myself and my kids.
So far, it had been working.
As far as the kids were concerned, any chance to camp out in the fields was a fun opportunity they couldn’t miss. They were now used to the earthy, starchy, grassy smell, the sound of crickets chirping, and the occasional rustle of small rabbits nearby scurrying through the underbrush. Bailey and Ryan usually wore themselves out singing nursery rhymes and playing with their toys under the tent. Then, using a dim flashlight, I read bedtime stories to them while cradling Brooke and rocking her to sleep. When they were all fast asleep, I would keep watch, waiting for Phil to arrive and timing our return to the house.
The plan was working, but tonight, Brooke’s feeble cries threatened to disrupt it. She had initially fallen asleep in my arms, but for some reason, her eyes opened back up moments later, and since then, she’d been crying and refused to go back to sleep. I tried to cradle her even more, hoping the cry would let up, but it only grew louder. I wasn’t worried about a neighbor hearing us and calling the cops to report a lost, crying baby in the fields; the house closest to our field was a good half-mile away. I was more worried about Bailey’s and Ryan’s sleep being interrupted and the possibility of Phil’s sudden return.
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This sounds like a really emotional read. Great eye catching title!
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